


To Be Alluring

by rainingover



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Mythology, M/M, Monsta X Bingo, Sirens, mentions of drowning/ watching someone struggle in water from POV of a siren
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-13
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-08-08 12:41:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7758241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainingover/pseuds/rainingover
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Minhyuk has always enjoyed being near water, though he has never been particularly interested in being in it. Standing at the edge of water, the wind at his hair as he stares down at his reflection, he feels kind of-- more alive. <em>Powerful.</em></p><p>He guesses it’s probably something to do with the whole siren thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. losing time

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Fantasy AU square for week 2 of MX fic bingo!
> 
> ( _In Greek mythology, the Sirens were beautiful yet dangerous creatures, who lured nearby sailors with their enchanting music and voices to shipwreck on the rocky coast of their island._ \- [good old wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siren_\(mythology\)))

Minhyuk has always enjoyed being near water, though he has never been particularly interested in being _in_ it. Standing at the edge of water, the wind at his hair as he stares down at his reflection, he feels kind of -- more alive. _Powerful_.

He guesses it’s probably something to do with the whole siren thing.

After all, it’s in his nature to flock to water. And to lure in lost sailors, to cause shipwrecks by enchanting those in hearing distance with his song.

He’s heard tales over the years about sirens still out there in the world living the more traditional lifestyle; waiting on tiny islands in the middle of vast oceans for sailors to veer off course, for a storm that sends men and women within hearing distance of their beautiful melody, ready to enchant and to lure, and then to revel in the human’s terrible fate.

What the sirens who still haunt the seas then _do_ with the people they’ve lured-- well, Minhyuk tries not to think about it. His mother always advised not to, advocated living side by side amongst regular humans, doing regular human things -- things like not using your voice to bewitch unsuspecting victims. Luckily, Minhyuk had found out by the time he was three that so long as he sang quietly and concentrated as hard as he could on not enchanting anyone, he could still sing along to his favourite songs and join in choruses of ‘happy birthday’ at parties without anyone realising he wasn’t quite like them.

It’s just-- well, recently, it’s been more difficult to keep it at bay.

To start with, there’s the dreams. The ones that seem so real that Minhyuk swears he hears the crashing of waves echoing in the room long after he wakes up. But they’re nothing compared to the lapses in concentration when he’s awake.

Like the times when he sets off to class, heads across the courtyard, music blasting through his headphones and the sun in his eyes and then finds himself in the sports centre, no where near his classes, standing at the edge of the swimming pool. His heartbeat is racing, gaze set on the water, imagining frothy seas and desperate cries and shipwrecks, and he has no idea how long he’s been standing there.

The first time it happens, Minhyuk puts it down to a slip in concentration, to the pressure of exams and over-tiredness and a wrong turn somewhere on the way to class.  

But it’s been happening once or twice a week, every week, for the last month, and now Minhyuk is out of excuses to tell himself about just why he keeps finding himself stood next to the closest thing to the ocean he can find on campus, on the cusp of mesmerising half of the swim team.

 

\---

 

“So, I heard that you’re in trouble with Professor Jang.” Kihyun throws his bag down onto his bed and shrugs off his jacket. “Continuous tardiness, or something.” He raises an eyebrow.

Minhyuk looks up from his phone and scowls. “Who are you? My mom? What have you done with my roommate?”

Kihyun just rolls his eyes. “How are you ever late to class, anyway? I make sure you get out of bed and into the shower way before classes start. It’s one of my proudest achievements as your roommate.”

Minhyuk shrugs. “Just happens.” It’s not like he’s lying.

“You’re lucky he hasn’t kicked you out of his class yet,” Kihyun goes on. And Minhyuk knows this, thinks about it every time he slips into the back of the lecture hall out of breath from the run he’s had to make from the swimming pool to the Arts building, mumbling hushed apologies to the students who turn around and glower in his direction.

“I’ll figure it out,” he replies, wants to change the subject before Kihyun presses any further.  “Want to order a pizza to the dorm?”

“I’d rather get fried chicken.”

Minhyuk pulls a face. “First to win three matches gets to choose,” he suggests, holds out a clenched fist to signal a game of Kai, Bai, Bo. Chicken wins.

Minhyuk also loses the round that determines who collects it at the door. He throws on a hoodie to make his way down to the front entrance and then heads back up to their floor with the bag cradled in his arms to keep it warm. When he gets back to their room Hyungwon is sat on Minhyuk’s bed, cross-legged and expectant.

Minhyuk stalls in the doorway. “Your room is next door, you know,” he says.

“I know, but the food is here,” Hyungwon points out and neither he nor Kihyun can argue with that.

“Yeah, well, you can pay next time,” Minhyuk motions for Hyungwon to move over and give him some space to sit down.

Hyungwon neither confirms nor denies whether he will do so, just takes a bite of chicken and says, “I saw you this morning, on the way to early classes. I didn’t know you had any in the sports centre.”

“He doesn’t,” Kihyun says through a mouthful of chicken, a pointed stare in Minhyuk’s direction. “Is this why you’re always late?

Minhyuk looks between his friends. “I was just-- I borrowed something and had to give it back.”

“What would you have borrowed from the sports centre?” Kihyun asks. “I know you love Haikyū!!, but you do realise you’re not on the volleyball team, right? Or have ever tried to be.”

“It was just-- just a book for class.” Minhyuk decides a book is the safest lie. He owns books. That’s reasonable. “That I borrowed from one of the swim team.”

Kihyun clearly doesn’t believe him, but he doesn’t mention it again.

 

\---

 

Minhyuk lies awake, listens to the calming sound of Kihyun’s breathing across the room.

Wonders about what he would have said if he had answered his friends’ questions truthfully earlier that night. If he’d admitted that, actually, he has no idea what he’s been doing at the sports centre, or why, or whether it will stop, but that it’s likely because he is subconsciously drawn to bodies of water where unsuspecting men dwell, being a siren and all.

When he finally drifts off to sleep, Minhyuk dreams about salty air and salty tears. About lying in a meadow, surrounded by wildflowers, cradled by the sun’s warmth and the sweet sound of a lyre somewhere behind him. He dreams about glossy eyes, enchanted by his song, and a sweet mouth, enchanted by his kiss.

“Sing for me,” The sweet mouth pleads. “I want to stay with you until I die, for a long, long time.”

And, in his dream, Minhyuk laughs. It sounds like bells, hundreds of bells ringing together, chiming in unison, except it isn’t a beautiful sound, it’s cold and it’s heartless and it’s mocking.

“And you will stay.” He breathes against the neck of his human companion. “But it won’t be for a long time.”

And then he wakes up.

Over the next few days, Minhyuk thinks about calling his mom, admitting he’s having a difficult time. Admitting he’s not as good as he thought he was at resisting the siren within him. But he doesn’t want to disappoint her, doesn’t want her to worry, so he doesn’t.

 

\---

 

Minhyuk tries to focus on the paper he needs to write the next evening. Lies on his stomach, laptop in front of him and kicks his legs absentmindedly in the air.

“You look like a mermaid when you do that.” Kihyun taps his pencil against his notepad and laughs.

_Not quite a mermaid, but in the right area,_ Minhyuk thinks, stills his legs and stretches.

The door opens and Hyungwon wanders in, leaving the door wide open. “You guys coming to the party tomorrow?” He asks. “It’s off campus, so there’s less chance of it being broken up by the noise police at midnight.”

Kihyun looks up. Says, “You do know the noise police aren’t a real service, don’t you?”

“Okay, now you’re not invited.” Hyungwon doesn’t even look at him. They’re like this sometimes, bickering. “Minhyuk?”

“We’ll come,” Minhyuk replies from his position on the floor. “Anything not have to spend my whole Friday night staring at the six words I’ve managed to write for this stupid paper.”

And Kihyun tuts and says, “I won’t let you go to sleep tonight until that’s half written.”

Minhyuk says, “Yes Mom,” with a grin, but he’s grateful for it really. The longer he spends writing the less time he spends dreaming of shipwrecks and salty kisses and the overwhelming yearning he’s starting to feel for the act of driving humanity crazy with desire for him.

 

\---

 

The party is already spilling out onto the sidewalk when they arrive. Minhyuk recognises a couple of people from his classes, nods hello, takes a paper cup of a luminous blue drink.

He doesn’t drink it, though. Has never been much of a drinker; drinking, he’s found, encourages him to sing loudly along to bad music or jump into hotel swimming pools (just once). And as fun as it is at the time, Minhyuk usually spends the next week in his room, terrified he’s enchanted someone.

He gives Hyungwon the cup, and Hyungwon seems to appreciate the gift, because he drinks it in less than ten seconds and then asks, “So, who is it you’re sneaking around with?”

“What?” Minhyuk has no idea what he’s talking about.

“Which one of the swim team?”

“What?”

“Oh come on, that’s what’s going on, right? That’s why you didn’t even notice me calling your name the other morning in the quad, you were all zoned out, thinking of some big, tanned--”

Minhyuk’s brain engages, remembers his excuses. “Oh! No -- I was borrowing a book. Returning it, I mean. That’s all.” He’s blushing, but only because he hates lying to his friends. Hyungwon reads the flush on his cheeks in another way, and smirks.

“Okay, okay. Fine. So, which one of them was it?” He points towards a group of guys in the corner.

Minhyuk guesses they’re the swim team. He doesn’t recognise any of them, or if he does the memory is blurred at the edges. One of them seems to recognise him, though, or maybe it’s just a complete coincidence that he glances in their direction at that exact moment.

“That one.” Minhyuk already starts to turn away, maybe he does need a cup of the blue stuff after all.

But Hyungwon has other ideas. “Hyunwoo?” He clarifies.

And, honestly, he could be saying anything, since Minhyuk has no idea who any of the team are, but he nods. “That’s right. Hyu-- him. So, shall we go and get another drink?”

Hyungwon outright laughs at him now. He’s enjoying this, and Minhyuk doesn’t blame him. If the tables were turned, he would be giggling with delight watching his friend squirm under the weight of the web they’d woven, all in good humour of course. “Yeah. But we aren’t leaving this party until you introduce me to your new friend.”

Minhyuk grumbles a “whatever,” and wonders how much alcohol it will take for Hyungwon to forget about it.

 

\---

 

No amount of alcohol makes Hyungwon forget about it.

He spots Minhyuk’s excuse for his wandering just as they’re about to head home and Minhyuk kicks himself for not realising that Hyungwon knows _everyone_ on campus. “Minhyuk was telling me you have a class together,” Hyungwon is saying, voice raised over the music. He jerks a thumb towards Minhyuk, who is trapped between them and any exit, and fated to ride this embarrassment out.

Minhyuk smiles hopefully. Maybe this guy isn’t quite human either. Maybe he’s a mind reader, maybe he can hear Minhyuk’s pleas to help him out.

Hyunwoo’s face does not fall into one of easy recognition. Just human then. “Do we?”

Minhyuk gives up on the telepathy and instead pleads desperately with his eyes, says, “Yeah, we-- That’s why I was at the pool the other day. I had to return that book I borrowed, _remember_?”

And the pleading eyes work just in time. “Oh, yeah.” Hyunwoo nods. “The book.” Minhyuk thinks he might love him a little bit for that.

Hyungwon asks, “Which class do you share?”

And Hyunwoo stares at him, is waiting for a cue. “Which-- which class is it, again?”

“Uh...” Minhyuk hadn’t thought this far.

“Well, it’s clearly not an acting class.” Hyungwon breaks the awkward silence and sips his drink happily. “I knew I was right.”

He isn’t, but Minhyuk just bites the inside of his cheek and breathes a sigh of relief when Hyungwon gets bored and wanders off. Mouths “thank you,” to his new fake-friend, who still looks confused as hell, but at least he doesn’t look angry, as they walk away.

 

\---

 

It’s less than a week later and he’s _there_ again, in the doorway to the swimming pool. He checks his watch, he’s started doing it ritually now, every few minutes, just to make sure he hasn’t lost any time. It’s fifteen minutes since he last looked, when he was almost at the building for his Art History class. He must have turned around and just-- just headed towards the water. Determined. 

Minhyuk sighs. This is getting more and more fucked up, and more and more worrying. He’s always been drawn to water, but it’s always been a conscious thing before. Not like this, losing himself completely and then waking up to what he’s doing with an urge to unleash the power of his song bubbling deep inside him.

Minhyuk takes a deep breath, tries to ignore the urge to walk into the building, closer to the water. He suddenly realises that he’s stood right in the middle of the entrance and senses someone behind him, waiting to pass, but clearly too polite to ask him to move.

“Sorry.” He turns around and comes face to face with Hyunwoo. Oh, shit. There is an excruciating moment where they side step the same way. “Sorry,” Minhyuk repeats, manages to slip round him to make his escape.

“Wait.” Hyunwoo calls after him, and Minhyuk is tempted not to, but that would be rude, and Hyunwoo _did_ try to help him out the other night. He turns back.

Maybe Hyunwoo wasn’t expecting him to, because he doesn’t speak at first. Finally he says, “I’ve noticed… Why _have_ you been hanging around the pool?” He dips his head.  “I mean, not that you have to tell me..”

Minhyuk feels a rock in the bottom of his stomach. This is _so_ embarrassing and Hyunwoo is so hot and he’s _noticed_ Minhyuk hanging around the pool doing goodness knows what. “I don’t -- I don’t even know.” What else can he say?

“I mean, if you’re thinking of trying out for the team, I could put a good word in for you.” Hyunwoo smiles at him.

“It’s not that.” Minhyuk tightens his grip on his backpack.

“So, you don’t want to swim, you’re just--- watching?”

“I’m not, like, checking you all out or whatever you’re implying,” Minhyuk says quickly. “Not that-- I mean, a lot of people would kill for your body.”

And Hyunwoo laughs at that, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “That kind of makes it sound like you’re just checking us all out.”

“It’s not the swim team, it’s complicated.” Minhyuk shifts uncomfortably.  “I can’t really explain it. But I’m not stalking you- any of you. I just...” He can’t find a way to finish. “Thank you for covering for me the other night.”

Hyunwoo doesn’t seem phased, just shrugs and says, half teasing, “Are you going to be popping by to return a book any time soon?”

“I honestly have no idea,” Minhyuk can’t help but smile, even if he does want the ground to open up and swallow him.

“Well if you do, come say hi,” Hyunwoo says, smiles again before making his way inside.

Minhyuk checks his watch and heads straight back to his dorm; classes be damned. 

 


	2. losing concentration

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the month wait! We get more of an insight into Hyunwoo in this chapter :).

Hyunwoo zones out when he’s swimming. Once he hits the water, there is only the rush of water, the desire to push himself, his heartbeat in his ears. He also zones out when he isn’t swimming, sometimes, but only in the most boring of classes. It just so happens that this semester, that’s most of them. It kind of sucks.

But, even if he zones out sometimes, he is totally, completely, infinitely sure that he doesn’t share a class with Hyungwon’s friend. The one who he apparently knows. The one called Minhyuk, who is standing in front of him in the middle of a party, grinning almost manically and nodding a million miles an hour as he says, “I had to return that book I borrowed, remember?” in a way that makes Hyunwoo feel like saying anything other than yes would be the literal end of the world.

He nods along and manages to mumble something about a book that doesn’t exist from a class he doesn’t take, whilst Hyungwon smirks and rolls his eyes and, finally, gets bored of watching them squirm.

“What was that about?” Hoseok is at his side within less than five seconds of a relieved Minhyuk leaving the scene. “Looked awkward. I mean, more awkward than your usual small-talk.”

Hyunwoo ignores the dig, knows Hoseok means it in good humour. And he's right, anyway. “Apparently I know that guy and lend him imaginary textbooks for a class we don’t have together.”

“What?”

Hyunwoo shrugs. Says, “I think he just needed an excuse for being at the pool or something and I accidentally caught his eye, so...”

Changkyun has wandered over and is at his other elbow now, saying, “Why would anyone need an excuse for being at the pool? It’s not exactly somewhere you’re not meant to go. I mean, unless you’re on the volleyball team, because-- fuck those guys.”

Wonho reaches across Hyunwoo’s body to shove at their younger teammate’s shoulder. “You have friends on the volleyball team, dumb-ass.”

“I know,” Changkyun says. “Lately we've been trying out a bit of team rivalry to see how it feels. Coach suggested it last week.”

“And how does it feel?” Hyunwoo asks.

Changkyun ponders this. “Not great, actually. I really love the guys on the volleyball team.”

Hoseok rolls his eyes. “As much as it pains me, I agree with Changkyunnie. What bad reasons are there for being at the pool?”

“I don't know, but, thinking about it, I’ve seen him there before.” Hyunwoo pauses. Adds another, “At least, I think I have.”

“You never notice _anything_ at the pool, aside from your time. And when one of us doesn’t show up.”

“Well I mean, it’s-- it’s hazy. But maybe when I’ve been in the water and--” Hyunwoo shrugs. “Maybe not, I guess…” He trails off.

Changkyun looks concerned about the abilities of his captain’s memory, but he doesn’t get a chance to voice this, as Hoseok’s face suddenly lights up and he exclaims, “Oh! Maybe he’s going to try out! We need some fresh blood on the team.” He grins, then. “And maybe his hot friend can come watch me-- uh, us, I mean. The team.”

“Do you ever think with your brain and not with your dick?” Changkyun asks, and accepts Hoseok’s fond punch to the arm with little more than a grin. As the youngest (and newest) member of the swim team, Changkyun gets away with more than most of the others, especially where Hoseok’s concerned. It’s endearing, Hyunwoo thinks, and he sometimes feels little swells of pride when he thinks about how much of a family their team can be sometimes.

Hyunwoo laughs as Changkyun yelps and says, “Make sure you don’t have too many more beers tonight. We have practice tomorrow.”

He is sure that he hears Changkyun reply with, “Yes, _Dad_ ,” as he heads back towards the rest of the team, but it only makes him smile a little more.

Changkyun really does get away with a lot.

 

\--

 

Even if some of his classes have been ill chosen and are taught by the kind of professor who could bore even the most die hard scholar to tears, Hyunwoo has never regretted a minute of college. Being accepted onto a highly competitive swimming scholarship was probably the proudest moment of his life so far, and his mother has told him countless times it’s hers as well. Plus, his team have become kind of like a whole new family, which is a pretty sweet deal when you're hundreds of miles away from your real one.

And there's the fact that he was elected captain this year; a role that comes with a ton of responsibility, of dedication and, sometimes, being pushed well out of his comfort zone. It also comes with a fuckton of perks, like having his own key to the sports building so he can practise at any time of the day or night. And the fact that half of the school want to buy him drinks and flirt with him.

“Although,” Hoseok reasons as he stands naked in the locker room before practise the next day, no apparent shame in doing so, “That is probably more to do with the fact that you're practically sculpted from marble. Like me.”

 

\--

 

Once Hoseok has been persuaded to put on his shorts, morning practise begins. It's the perfect wake up call; no coffee can rival the alertness that the pool brings, and he rarely goes a day without swimming as a part of his morning routine. Even the grimmest of hangovers can't keep him away from the water; he wonders if anything could. 

Hyunwoo pulls his goggles down over his eyes and steps up to the edge of the water.

He concentrates on the blue in front of him, blocks out the noise from around him and takes his position.

And then he is underwater, body streamlined as he glides, only the end of the pool in his sight. When he surfaces, he hears nothing but the rush of the water around him, then he takes in a deep breath and breaks the surface once again. It feels good.

It’s all over too fast. Then he’s pulling himself out of the edge of the pool, the sound of chatter and the coach’s raised voice filling his ears again, and if his eyes search the bleachers for someone unfamiliar; someone (not) returning a (nonexistent) book, he pretends they don't.

It's just-- he's more than a little bit intrigued about Minhyuk, if he's honest. It's not like he's been _thinking_ about the guy from the party, not subconsciously at least, but apparently there is something about someone dragging you into their web of deceit that makes you want to be in receipt of the truth.

Especially when that someone is kind of cute. 

 

\--

 

So, Hyunwoo doesn't spot his new partner-in-lies in the bleachers that morning, but he does practically walk right into his back at the entrance to the sports centre almost a week later, half zoned out, thinking of the rush of the water and how many seconds he needs to shave off his current time, when he realises exactly who is blocking his path.

Minhyuk doesn't react when he clears his throat, doesn't even flinch when he says, “Hey, can I get past?”. It isn't until Hyunwoo reaches out and shakes his shoulder gently that Minhyuk even seems to breathe. He turns around slowly, looking like he is almost as confused as Hyunwoo feels, before he hurries past him and out into the quad.

Hyunwoo isn't sure what makes him call out, but he's glad he does, even if their conversation leaves him with nothing but more questions about what Minhyuk is doing, trance-like and blissfully still, in the doorway to the pool for no apparent reason.

He can't concentrate during practice, even in the water, eyes focused on the end of the pool, instead he thinks about the stillness of Minhyuk's figure in the doorway, Thinks about how much he seemed to want to be able to explain, but couldn't find the words.

He decides that it had been kind of beautiful, in a way, when Minhyuk had finally turned around; His eyes bright, his skin glowing, even with flushed cheeks and an embarrassed smile, there had been something different about him. Something that hadn't been there at the party. An ethereal brightness that Hyunwoo had felt drawn to, that made him feel compelled to stop him from walking away.

Hoseok gives him a sly look as they leave practice. Says, “Either you just got laid or you need to.”

“What?”

“You're all misty eyed and distracted." Hoseok points out, "Coach is going to notice.”

“I'm just-- hungry.” Hyunwoo comes up with his go-to excuse for being anything other than on the top of his game. It's usually the truth anyway. 

“Don't lie. I spotted you talking to that guy from the party in the quad before practise.”

“And?”

“And my interpretation still stands.” Hoseok pulls insanely tight jeans up over his calves and grins. "He's got to be hanging round here for a reason, and if that reason isn't swimming, maybe it's another strenuous activity you both have in mind?"

Hyunwoo rolls his eyes. "I barely know him," He says. Adds, "Don't you think it's weird though? That he's just-- hanging round? It's like, it's almost like he doesn't even want to be here, he just-- is.”

Hoseok raises an eyebrow. "I have literally no idea what you're talking about."

"Me neither." Hyunwoo laughs, shakes his head and breathes out. He wishes he did, though.

Hoseok pats him on the back gently. "Stop obsessing over things that aren't how to avoid being demoted by coach for not concentrating. And  _please_ get laid before meet season really starts. We need you on your A game." He pulls his sweater on over his head and picks up his bag. "You can thank me by getting me a date with hot-friend from the party."

"Thanks for the advice," Hyunwoo mutters, as his friend leaves the locker room, and he does kind of mean it, but he zones out in two of his classes that afternoon regardless.

Spends his time wracking his brain for reasons as to why Minhyuk is so familiar and yet so evasive and vows that, even if he fails in getting laid, he needs to know more about him and the secret that brings him to the pool before the month is up. 

But only, he decides, because he wants to avoid letting the team down, and not because he's getting distracted by any, uh, other activities that Hoseok might have suggested. Probably. 


	3. losing sleep

The next few days go by uneventfully for Minhyuk, aside from one short, awkward meeting with Professor Jang, who, as Kihyun had warned him, has something to say about the fact that Minhyuk hasn't made it to the start of the majority of his classes for the last month.

Minhyuk cringes as the Professor chews him out, nods vigorously as he goes on at length about his future, about dedication and motivation and advises him to think long and hard about whether he's committed to his class. Minhyuk gets up way before Kihyun usually wakes him the next time he has an early class, is showered and dressed and leaving the dorms an hour before the class begins, despite the fact the building is only a fifteen minute walk away.

He makes it to class with forty three minutes to spare (okay, so maybe he's being _too_ cautious now), sits down on the floor beside the entrance to the lecture hall and keeps his eye on the clock across the hallway to make sure he stays there. He counts the second hand as it ticks round, and round, and... And it's the most mind numbingly tedious way to pass the time, but Minhyuk reasons that it's better than losing concentration and finding himself somewhere else. Again.

(The sports centre for example.)

Professor Jang gives him a look that is a mixture between impressed and freaked out when he arrives at the lecture hall at ten to eight, and Minhyuk makes an effort to offer answers to as many questions as he can during the seminar.

Kihyun would be proud of him.

 

\--

 

The days following his conversation with Hyunwoo outside the swimming pool may be uneventful, but the nights are insufferable. The dreams don't stop. In fact, they might be getting worse.

Minhyuk has always dreamt about the ocean; about waves and song and a desire to cause devastation with his voice. He's been dreaming similar visions ever since he could remember; waking up sobbing as a child and asking his parents why the ships always sink, before he could understand what the dreams meant or who he really was. And then, as he grew older, wondering why he was always so happy in his dreams whilst everyone around him was dying. What it meant about him, whether it made him a bad person. Or not even a person at all. Whether it made him a monster.

He understands now that being a siren doesn't have to mean being a monster, not if he is always in control. Which would be all good and well if his ability to control the urge to head to water and enchant someone hadn't started taking over his subconscious on a daily basis.

Now it _has _, the question at the back of his mind - the one he thought he'd answered long ago - is back again.__

Is he a monster? He's still not sure about it when he's awake, but when he's asleep... Well, he's definitely a monster in his dreams.

 

\--

 

It's almost four am and he's gripping the edge of the sink in the bathroom on his floor. The strip lighting overhead is buzzing, and one of the taps on the sink next to him won't turn off. He blinks, stares at his reflection until he's sure it's okay to let go.

Minhyuk is tired and thirsty and there are still waves crashing in his ears, even though it's been at least fifteen minutes since he woke up gasping for breath, so sure the blood on his hands would still be there after he turned on the light.

It wasn't, of course. The man dying in his arms wasn't real, the ocean wasn't there and he wasn't lounging on the rocks, smiling down blissfully happily at the wide, adoring dark eyes of an enchanted sailor, one so determined to reach Minhyuk and his sweet song that he had just thrown himself from the safety of his ship and into the merciless water, wild and mocking as it had drawn him towards the jagged rock-face.

But it had _felt_ so real when he had opened his eyes. It still does, as Minhyuk uses all of his strength to turn off the leaking faucet in the bathroom before making his way back to his and Kihyun's room and climbs back into bed. He feels guilty. Guilty and shaken and wrong, but also like it's what he was made to do. Like it's something that, deep down, he really wants.

Minhyuk doesn't sleep again that night.

 

\--

 

Minhyuk spends his afternoon in the library, trying to catch up on the lecture notes for the classes he only half listened to during the day. He loses track of time (again, a recurring theme in his life these days) and doesn't remember to check his phone until Kihyun has left him three voicemails, each one increasingly more irate, about waiting for him outside the cafeteria and getting bored and about never promising to eat with him again. Minhyuk texts him an apologetic message, complete with multiple compliments about what a great roommate he is. 

It seems to sate Kihyun's anger a little bit, as compliments often do.

By the time Minhyuk makes it back to campus, the cafeteria is pretty empty and there isn't much left in the way of choice, there isn't even any pizza. He chooses some soup and sits down at an empty table, texts Kihyun another compliment and a promise that he'll pay for the chicken again next time they order in to make standing him up earlier up to him.

“You should be eating more if you’re going to start swimming. Carbs are your friend.” When Minhyuk looks up from his phone, someone is putting his tray down opposite and sliding onto the bench. "I'm Hoseok, by the way. And _you're_ Hyunwoo's new friend."

Minhyuk says, "Well, I'm not sure if we're-- I've just spoken to him a couple of times."

"Because you're planning to try out for the team?"

"Uh, no." Minhyuk shakes his head. "I'm not really a swimmer."

“I didn’t think so.” Hoseok grins. “You know, you’re pretty slim. He could totally throw you around, if that’s what you’re into.”

“What?” Minhyuk doesn't think Hoseok is talking about swimming anymore.

Hoseok just grins again. “You actually pull off the whole confused, innocent thing quite convincingly. Unlike your friend, the kind of slouchy model one who you were with at the party. Think you could introduce us?”

“Slouchy-- oh. Hyungwon."

Hoseok says, "Wait, let me put that into my phone so I remember. I'm not great with names. Is he your roommate?”

“He should be so lucky," Minhyuk smiles. Hyungwon would love that: Kihyun to wake him up in the morning, Minhyuk to make fun of Kihyun with. The three of them have talked about moving off campus and sharing an apartment together before, but Kihyun knows that neither of them would help him clean it, so he refuses to leave the dorms for now. "His room is next door, though.”

"I wish I had a super hot neighbour. Put in a good word for me, could you?"

"A good word with who?" Hyunwoo picks up the conversation, slides onto the bench next to Hoseok. Minhyuk wonders why he is suddenly being ambushed by the swim team, although he knows it's his fault really for, you know, turning up at the pool for no reason and then forcing one of them to help him lie to his friends.

“Tall, slouchy, model guy," Hoseok explains. "From the party last week."

Hyunwoo makes a face that suggests Hoseok may have mentioned Hyungwon fifty times since the party. 

“ _And_ before that I was telling Minhyukie here that he needs to start loading up on the carbs to fuel all of the forthcoming intensive exercise if he wants you to put him through his paces.”

“I thought you weren’t interested in joining the team?" Hyunwoo's eyebrows shoot up. He smiles, "So, you changed your mind?"

Minhyuk opens his mouth to speak but Hoseok gets there first. Laughs and says, “Oh, I’m not talking about swimming. Anyway, gotta go. See you at the pool later.”

He's still laughing to himself as he leaves.

"What was that about?" Hyunwoo watches his friend saunter off and hopes to god his friend hasn't told Minhyuk about his lack of concentration at practice, or his conclusion about what needs to be done about it.

Minhyuk shrugs. "I don't know, but I get the distinct impression that for all his talk, Hyungwon would eat him alive if I set them up." He places a hand over his mouth, yawns into his palm. "Sorry."

“Late night?” Hyunwoo asks, as he is infected by the yawn himself.

“Something like that,” Minhyuk replies. “You?”

“Yeah, I didn’t leave the pool until after three," Hyunwoo says. "It'll probably be the same tonight.”

“I didn’t realise the pool was open all night." Minhyuk feels a tinge of uneasiness. The less amount of time the pool is accessible to trespassers with a penchant for dreaming about shipwrecks the better.

Hyunwoo shakes his head. “Oh, no, it’s not. I just have a key -- captain’s privileges. Or curse, maybe." He smiles and adds, "It’s so hard to leave that place sometimes.”

Which is a feeling that Minhyuk knows all too well.

 

\--

 

His face is a ripple in the reflection of the water.

His t-shirt is wet in places, his hands too. And Hyunwoo is there as well, underneath the water. No, not underneath anymore. Now he’s at the surface, shaking water from his hair, from his eyes. He coughs curses, and coughs again.

It’s the most beautiful sight. Minhyuk wonders what he would look like struggling to the shores of the sea, grasping to catch a hold of the rock face, or of his outstretched hand. Begging him to pull him out of the water and into his arms. He’s so strong, Minhyuk can see that. And it makes him want to laugh. Because, Hyunwoo is strong, but he’s still defenceless against Minhyuk’s allure. And that makes him feel so _good_ , so powerful and--

And Minhyuk suddenly realises that he's really there. He's standing at the edge of the pool, watching Hyunwoo pull himself up and out of the water. Watching as he tries to catch his breath as he does. “You didn't see that," Hyunwoo says when he can breathe again, and pulls the goggles from his head, dropping them onto the wet tile next to him.

Minhyuk looks around. Hopes he's dreaming again, but he's cold, his t-shirt sticking to his chest, his breath stuck in his throat. He's awake. Unfortunately.

“Are you trying to drown me or something?” Hyunwoo is laughing now, shaking water from his hair and looking up at Minhyuk with amused eyes. “Shit, that was so weird. I _swear_ I'm a better swimmer than that.”

“Fuck, I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry." Minhyuk realises that Hyunwoo is talking to him. He's okay and he doesn't seem angry, which Minhyuk guesses is a blessing of sorts. Even if he can't remember why or how he's here. He has a good idea, but he'd rather not think about that right now. "What-- what happened?" 

“I never get distracted during sessions. I can always, you know," He raises his hands to the sides of his face. "Stay in the zone, focus just on the end of the pool. But-- I don’t know. I realised you were there and just-- lost control of my limbs? I’m probably over tired as well.” He dips his head. "Ahhh, so embarrassing."

" _You're_ embarrassed? What time is it, even?" Minhyuk takes in his bare feet, bare legs and realises he's wearing what he went to bed in. "I don't even know what's..."

“Sleepwalking sucks." Hyunwoo stands up. "You know, I had this friend in highschool who did it too, he could never go on school vacations.”

Minhyuk blinks. Sleepwalking. Okay. Yeah. He can get behind that; it's kind of what happens, anyway. The same sorts of rules apply.

(Aside from wanting to drown people. Really nice, super hot people.)

"Yeah, it's-- I guess it's like that." He runs a hand through his own, dry, hair and tries not to stare. "Don't tell anyone, will you? It's -- I'm still trying to get it figured out."

“Sleepwalking," Hyunwoo repeats, smiling to himself. "And Hoseok thought you…”

“He thought what?” Minhyuk is intrigued. Wonders if this is anything to do with Hoseok's cryptic teasing earlier.

Hyunwoo just shakes his head. "Look, give me five minutes to change and lock up, and then I'll find you some shoes to walk back in."

"Oh, it's okay, you don't have to leave." Minhyuk just wants to escape and wallow in his own embarrassment for a while. Maybe get some sleep. Or at least lie still with his eyes closed in a perfect imitation of it, just so Kihyun doesn't start to nag with him worry over his clear inability to pass the semester when running on five percent brain power.

"I should, though. I don't know why I'm still here so late, anyway. My time isn't going to get any better tonight after that." 

"That's my fault," Minhyuk cringes.

"Partially," Hyunwoo admits with a smile and begins to walk towards the entrance to the locker rooms at the back of the pool. "I won't be long. Oh, you have a really nice voice, by the way."

"Voice?"

"Singing voice." He turns back, laughs as he says, "Almost killed me, it was so good." 

And that’s when Minhyuk’s night goes from bad to worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a few fic fest deadlines coming up so this might be the last chapter for a few weeks (but then again it might not!) :)


	4. losing sobriety

When Hyunwoo gets back to his dorm, it’s almost light outside. He doesn’t have a class until after eleven, so he figures he might get about five hours sleep, even factoring in wind-down time.

What he _doesn’t_ factor in is Hoseok being awake and chatty.

Hoseok’s face is lit up in the white glow of the light of his phone when he gets in. He looks up and takes in Hyunwoo's wet hair and his kit bag thrown over his shoulder. “Oh, you’ve been training,” He says, pouting a little. "Never mind."

“What did you think I’d been doing?” Hyunwoo asks, switching on the light.

“Something more _fun_.” Hoseok drops his phone onto the bed. “Nocturnal kind of fun… I was staying up to congratulate you.”

Hyunwoo rolls his eyes and shoves his kit bag underneath his bed, before pulling his hoodie over his head and discarding it over the back of the desk chair neither of them ever seem to use. He really should study more.

“Did you improve your time at least?” Hoseok asks.

Hyunwoo turns off the light again and gets into bed. “What are you really doing awake?”

“I told you already,” Hoseok all but whines. “So, did you improve your time or not?”

“Not.” Hyunwoo shuts his eyes. Maybe he could still get those five hours sleep, maybe he could just sleep through Hoseok’s grand inquisition.

“No? Sorry, bro.” Hoseok replies and sounds so sincere about it that Hyunwoo almost feels guilty for wanting him to shut up ten seconds before.

“Thanks.” Hyunwoo stifles a yawn and says, "Didn't even finish my lap, never mind anything else.”

“What?”

“I was swimming and, uh, Minhyuk just kind of appeared out of nowhere. I swallowed so much water.” Hyunwoo laughs awkwardly at the memory. “It was so embarrassing.”

“Wait.” Hoseok switches his phone to flashlight mode and holds it in Hyunwoo’s direction; the inquisition appears to be back on his agenda. “What I’m getting from this is that some cute guy came out for a booty call in the middle of the night and you freaked out and almost drowned yourself.”

“He didn’t come for-- I don't think he even know where he was,” Hyunwoo points out. Why did he even bring this up? Aside from the obvious fact that he wants to talk about it, to mull it over, to be reassured that he didn’t look as much of an idiot as he feels like he did. Not that he’d admit that.

Hoseok sighs. “If you don’t sleep with him soon I’m quitting the team.”

“You don’t even know whether he would want to sleep with me. Or if _I_ would want to sleep with him.”

“Well, you would wouldn’t you? You do like him.”

Hyunwoo pauses for longer than he should have, says, “That isn’t the point,” and rolls over, his back to his roommate, inquisition over.

 

\--

 

Despite the fact that he apparently waited up half of the night to interrogate his roommate, Hoseok is already up and gone when Hyunwoo drags himself out of bed the next morning.

By the time he gets to his first class, Hyunwoo has just about gotten over his minor (no, scratch that, major) embarrassment from the night before. Now he’s just confused. He always zones out when he’s swimming, can always switch off from everything - from the shouting, the echo of the door the sports building slamming shut in the wind, the cheers on meet days - every noise blocked out as soon as he hits the water.

What had been so different the night before?

Hyunwoo feels like he knows the answer, that it’s there, somewhere, in the back of his mind, but it doesn’t want to surface. Maybe he doesn’t want it to.

He makes it out of his last class of the day with only one disappointed remark from his professor about daydreaming and taking his academic studies as seriously as he takes his scholarship, avoids the dining hall in favour of grabbing cup-ramen from the campus grocery and contemplates spending the night sleeping off the discomfort of the day.

But when he gets back to his room after class, all hope of lying down in the dark and feeling sorry for himself dissipates. Hoseok is back from dinner early, or maybe he’d never been, and Changkyun is there too, sprawled out at the end of Hoseok’s bed, engrossed in something in his phone.

“You look very serious,” Hoseok notes as Hyunwoo enters. He’s holding a pair of scissors dangerously close to his skin as he slices through the denim of his jeans eight inches above his knee. This isn’t unusual; Hoseok likes to adjust his clothes to, in his words, “show the world what they deserve to see.”

(Hyunwoo had made a semi-joking comment about Hoseok’s propensity for removing his shirt at any opportunity not long after they had started rooming together, to which he’d been met with a genuinely confused look from Hoseok. “Why else would I be a swimmer?” He’d said, as if this was completely obvious.

“Because you’re good at swimming?” Hyunwoo had suggested.

“Yeah,” Hoseok had agreed, “That too, but also because I look great topless and wet.”)

“Hmm?” Hyunwoo looks away, doesn’t really want to be witness to any accidental injury Hoseok is close to causing. “Oh, I’ve just had a weird day.”

Hoseok discards the scissors and heads towards the mini-fridge they keep behind their door. “Want a beer?”

Hyunwoo collapses onto his bed and lets out a long breath. “Why not.”

“Well,” Hoseok says, “I _can_ think of some good reasons, like the fact that we’re getting super close to meet season and you told me last night that you’ve gone and forgotten how to even keep your head above water.”

“I didn’t say-- I just lost my concentration, that’s all. And can we not keep bringing that up? I don’t need the whole team to know.”

“Know what?” Changkyun looks up from his phone. Hyunwoo can’t tell if he’s being smart or if he genuinely wasn’t listening. It’s probably the latter, going by how much he listens in training (not that it matters at all; he might be the youngest member of the team, but he’s already _so_ good, Hyunwoo can imagine him being captain one day).

Hoseok smiles and thrusts a bottle into Hyunwoo’s hand. “Time to relax.”

Hyunwoo pulls a face. He feels about a thousand miles away from relaxed right now.

Hoseok says, “We’re your friends, we care about you. And we think that you should drink a beer and relax.”

“And then get laid before Hoseok-hyung quits the team,” Changkyun chimes in. Hoseok looks proud of his addition to the speech.

“Not you as well.” Hyunwoo groans. “Look, I’ll drink the beer, but I can’t promise anything else.”

 

\--

 

One beer turns into four beers, which turns into Hoseok adding another large slash to the thigh of his jeans and then Changkyun finally looking up from his phone again and announcing that he’s going to a bar to be around, in his words, “cooler people”.

“We’re cool!” Hyunwoo argues.

“What? We’re coming with you,” Hoseok announces. “We’re cool. _You_ think we’re cool.”

Changkyun doesn’t deny it, but then he doesn’t agree with the statement either. Just calls a cab and goes back to whatever, or whoever, is more interesting than they are on his phone until it arrives.

The bar is busy by the time they filter in through the door, filled with an array of students who are disregarding the fact that it's the middle of the week and there are classes the next morning. "No one here is cooler than us," Hoseok points out, looking around. His eyes rest of the bar. " _Except_ for the bartender. The bartender is-- oh, it's hot, tall model guy! Shit, I love Changkyun for bringing us here."

Changkyun pulls a face. "I didn't bring you here, you both just latched onto me."

"Shush." Hoseok tugs at the collar of his relaxed, wide necked tee. "Am I showing enough collarbone?" He asks, but Changkyun has already wandered away.

By the time he makes it to the bar and in front of Hyungwon, Hoseok's relaxed tee is practically stretched beyond recognition, and he's stood on his tiptoes waiting to be noticed. 

It's actually kind of adorable. 

 

\--

 

Hyunwoo kind of hopes that attempting to pursue Hyungwon will distract him from telling everyone that they come across about his swimming fail the night before, and he's contemplating this when the cause of his distraction appears in his peripheral vision, waving towards the bar as he catches Hyungwon's attention briefly, before Hoseok gladly takes it back again.

Minhyuk.

Minhyuk spots him as he takes down his hood and smiles. "Oh, hello! Don't worry, I came here on purpose. Look, I'm even wearing shoes." 

Hyunwoo smiles back. He's glad that Minhyuk is able to make fun of himself, thinks that maybe he should try it too. Says, "And I'm managing not to drown right now, so things are really looking up."

"It's like we're both fully functioning adults or something," Minhyuk quips. Looks over at the bar and then looks at his watch. "Oh no. Does Hoseok know that his shift ends in four minutes?"

"What?"

"Hyungwon -- he's only working until ten. We're getting some food when he's finished; it's his turn to pay so I couldn't miss out."

Hyunwoo watches their friends. Says, "It's probably for the best that he can't spend all night flirting outrageously. I hope Hyungwon likes exhibitionists, by the way." 

Minhyuk laughs. "He does, actually. See, he's actually _smiling_ at whatever chat-up line Hoseok is using. He usually just pretends not to hear when customers hit on him." 

"Should I be planning my best man speech already?"

"Maybe not just-- oh now they're looking at us and laughing." Minhyuk happily flips Hyungwon and Hoseok the finger as they turn their way. "You didn't mention my, err, sleepwalking, did you?"

Hyunwoo shakes his head. "No, but I did mention the whole me swallowing half of the pool water thing. And- um, and Hoseok has got it into his head that I like you, so he's probably telling your friend. Hence the laughter. Just to warn you."

“How has he got that idea?" 

“Well… I mean, I do.”

Minhyuk nods slowly. “Right. Since last night? You realised it last night, didn't you?"

Hyunwoo contemplates this. Last night had been the first time he'd really thought about it, but only because Hoseok _made_ him. Kind of. "Yeah, but--"

"Ugh, I knew it." Minhyuk's face falls. "I Knew I’d screwed up. I mean, _singing,_  of all things! Shit, I don't even know if there's a way to _fix_ this.”

Hyunwoo opens his mouth to respond, although he has no idea what he's going to say because he has doesn't know what Minhyuk is talking about. "I just think you're cute, that's all. I have since the book-returning lie thing at the party," He settles on. Can tell he's turning red, and it's not just from the alcohol. "And I didn't hear much of the singing, for the record."

“You didn't?"

He shakes his head. He still hasn't got a clue what's going on, but at least Minhyuk looks happier. Apparently that kind of thing matters to him now, plus he doesn't even feel like falling into a pit of fire after admitting that he finds Minhyuk cute, although, he thinks, that's probably just the effects of the alcohol. 

"Why does it matter, anyway?" He asks. "Whether I heard you sing?"

"It matters because I like you too," Minhyuk replies, somewhat cryptically. "So, how about you and Mr Exhibitionist come with us for food?"


	5. losing grip

“I’m not paying for dinner for four. I’m not made of money,” Hyungwon makes clear as they head back towards campus. 

“I’ll pay for mine and Hoseok’s, I have some cash on me,” Hyunwoo says. “And I owe him beer money.”

“Yes you do, and so does Changkyun, come to think of it.” Hoseok ponders this for a few seconds. “I'll probably just let him off.”

Hyunwoo smiles. Says, “You always do.”

“He’s the baby, I have to!” Hoseok proclaims.

Hyungwon rolls his eyes. “Cute,” he says, and Hoseok leans across Minhyuk to tell Hyungwon, quite seriously, that, "I’m not cute, I’m  _ sexy _ .”

Hyungwon just laughs, but Minhyuk can tell that Hyungwon is genuinely weighing up whether this might be true (and possibly thinking that he wants to find out for himself), so he slows down in his pace and falls back, leaving them to walk ahead together.

He's happy that someone so warm and open and actually deserving of his friend has a crush on Hyungwon for once, and happy that Hyungwon actually seems to like him back, even if Minhyuk knows he's going to deny it for as long as possible. That's just the way that Hyungwon works: slow to open up, worth it when he does.

(Minhyuk learned this through experience -- he and Kihyun had spent months convinced that Hyungwon didn't like them, convinced he was only hanging out in their dorm room to avoid his annoying roommate, until one day when Kihyun had mentioned it and Hyungwon had replied, "Oh, him? He quit college two weeks into the first semester," and they'd realised then that he actually _liked_ them.")

Minhyuk falls into step with Hyunwoo behind them and it feels comfortable, even if he isn't quite able to ignore the fact that he desperately wants to grab his hand and take him back to the pool to finish what he'd started the night before. Minhyuk shoves his hands into his pockets, pushes the thoughts to the back of his mind and tries to think of something, anything to say that isn't, _"I'm so glad I didn't manage to drown you yesterday, although I kind of want to do it again right now,"_ or, _"Sorry for all that weird cryptic stuff I said back there about the whole singing thing.”_

All he can find to say is, “So, uh-- you and Hoseok, you're roomies, right?”

Hyunwoo nods. “Yeah, and we’re on the team together.”

“I can’t imagine seeing my roommate that much,” Minhyuk says.

Hyunwoo frowns. “You don’t get on?”

“Oh, no, he’s actually one of my best friends.” Minhyuk smiles. “It's just, I guess I can sometimes be a bit… much. And I think he feels like he needs to be my human alarm clock has these days, otherwise I never make it to class.”

“You have a good reason for being tired, though.”

Minhyuk says, "Yeah, I guess..." even though he knows fully well that he doesn't, or at least it doesn't feel like he does. Sleepwalking would be one thing, going into a supernatural trance and heading off determinedly towards swimming pools in the middle of the night in is another thing entirely.

"You could tell him about it," Hyunwoo points out and Minhyuk suddenly feels guilty that he's ended up burdening an almost-stranger with his half-made-up troubles.

"Maybe," he replies. He  _ has _ thought about it fleetingly before. About telling Kihyun or Hyungwon, or both of them. But then it just seems so ridiculous: the thought of sitting his friends down and looking them in the eye and saying, "By the way, I've been recently getting the urge to make people fall in love with me so I can lure them to their untimely death... But don't worry, I'm trying awfully hard not to!"

He gets the distinct impression that Hyungwon wouldn't buy him dinner ever again, but maybe he's underestimating his friend's ability to deal with having (not actually) mythological creatures for next door neighbours. 

Maybe it would all work out as okay as it possibly could, but that's not a risk Minhyuk wants to take, not yet at least.

 

\--

  
  


They end up at a tiny, hole-in-the-wall pizza place two blocks away from campus. Hyungwon asks for “his favourite” and the girl working the pizza oven seems to know exactly what he means. “I’m a regular,” he points out when Hyunwoo looks confused.

(“And that girl is in love with him,” Minhyuk whispers as an aside, as they all slide into a booth. Hyunwoo doesn't seem surprised.)

"Fuck, this is _ so _ amazing." Hoseok rolls a slice up as soon as the pizza arrives and closes his eyes as he tastes it. "This is officially my new favourite place.”

Hyungwon says, “Well, it _is_ the best pizza place in the city.”

“Maybe the best in the world," Minhyuk joins in.

"It's _so_ good. You have the best taste in pizza joints." Hoseok turns to face Hyungwon. His voice sounds so sincere that Hyungwon actually looks touched. He doesn't even roll his eyes. 

“Actually, maybe you _should_ start writing that best man speech now." Minhyuk nudges Hyunwoo.

Hyungwon bristles. “Er, we can hear you since we're literally sat right here, a metre away from you, you know.”

“We know.” Minhyuk happily shoves a slice of pizza into her mouth.

“Why don’t you two stop taking an interest in us and go do nasty things in the pool or whatever it is you sneak around doing at night," Hoseok grins, licking pizza grease from his thumb.

Hyunwoo's face turns scarlet. “We don’t--”

" _In_ the pool?" Hyungwon interrupts. “Minhyuk can’t even swim.”

“Really? Maybe our friend here should give you some private lessons," Hoseok suggests, his grin firmly in place.

Minhyuk just pulls a face. Sirens are made to spend time _beside_ water, not in it. Minhyuk will admit that,, and even if he’s meant to live as a regular human he's never been keen on being in the water with them. It doesn't exactly help suppress his urges, which is something that was always on the forefront of his mind growing up. And even now it _really_ is, it's just so damn difficult these days. 

“Just finish your pizza, we have training in like, seven hours," Hyunwoo throws a napkin at Hoseok, who dodges it just in time, but still his grin doesn't fade.

\--

 

Minhyuk does wonder what swimming would be like sometimes, but he spends so much time desperate to reach water, and so little time wanting to be in it, it’s almost an alien concept. He’s been in the pool a couple of times - teenage pool parties were all the rage back home for a few years - but he’s never strayed past the shallow end, some excuse or other about his hair or a drink in either hand to avoid being expected to swim. It had never been an enjoyable experience; he’d gone to keep up appearances and spent the whole afternoon beyond terrified that he’d succumb to his base desires and entrance half of his classmates in one, easy, go.

Now he’s pretty much completely certain he’d succumb to it. He had the night before, anyway. 

Minhyuk tries not to think about it as they leave the pizza place, debates with Hoseok about the best place for coffee on campus for a while before the conversation dwindles, and they walk in a happy silence, bellies full.

"You really need to be careful, you know," Hyunwoo says to him after a while.

"What?" Minhyuk takes in his furrowed brow, the concern in his expression and can't for the life of him think what Hyunwoo is talking about.

"If you can't swim, you need to be careful. It's-- what if you'd fallen in last night?" 

Oh. That. "I wouldn't have," Minhyuk replies.

Hyunwoo doesn't look any less concerned. "How do you know?"

Minhyuk tries to verbalise why, but in the end he just shrugs and smiles. He can't verbalise why because the reason he knows that in no uncertain terms would he have allowed himself to get into danger the night before was because deep down he knew exactly what I was doing, at least a part of him did. The siren part. The part that wants to watch Hyunwoo drown. 

He hates to think about it, but it's true and he knows he can't avoid it forever.

Still, as he walks back to campus beside Hyunwoo, full of the best pizza in the city (if not the world) and secretly pleased in the knowledge that Hyunwoo would worry about him, Minhyuk hopes that avoiding the truth for a little while longer won't do any harm.

(Even if there is a part of him that knows it definitely will.) 


	6. losing tact

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the loooong wait between chapters. The next one will be up much, much sooner. Promise!

Hyunwoo doesn’t usually work fast, not like Hoseok does.

Hyungwon and Hoseok are already into the spending-all-weekend-in-bed, honeymoon phase of their relationship. Although, Hyungwon has been very keen to emphasise that it isn’t a relationship, not in any official capacity. Hoseok says he’s cool with this, but Hyunwoo isn’t sure he’s telling the truth. Not that he’s going to meddle in his roommate’s affairs, he’s got enough of a headache thinking about his own love-life.

(Or lack thereof.)

“I'm saying this as a friend. One if your best," Hoseok says, turning in the mirror to check out his own body in his new speedos, as if it's going to look different to how it did when he studied it an hour before. “Just go for it. Minhyuk wants to eat you up.”

“Um-”

“And letting off a little steam would be good for you. I’m not the team physio but even _I_ can see that you’re all tense. Oh! Maybe you can get Minhyuk yo give you a massage, as well as a blowjob.”

Hyunwoo groans and runs a hand over his face. He should be used to Hoseok by now, but no matter how many times his roommate mentions blowjobs (which, on average, is at least every other day) he still can’t quite get used to it. Hyunwoo is all for blowjobs, it's just mentioning them before breakfast every day seems a little unnecessary.

He doesn’t remember crushes being this difficult before.  “It's just... Sometimes I think he likes me, and then he says things that-- that I don’t _understand_.” Things about singing and screwing up and needing to fix something.

“And how many syllables do these difficult words have in them?” Hoseok sticks his tongue into the side of his cheek and smirks.

“That isn’t what I mean and you know it.”

“Why don't you go over to his room tonight,” Hoseok suggests, as if it’s _that_ easy. “Hyungwon said his roommate is away for the weekend, so he'll be all alone.”

“No, that’s -- too forward.” Hyunwoo pulls a face. It’s the sort of grand gesture that someone else could pull off as reckless and romantic, but Hyunwoo can just imagine looking really, awkwardly, creepy if he tries it.

Hoseok pulls his sweater over his head, wriggles it down over his body and rolls his eyes at Hyunwoo’s reluctance. “Too forward? This is the twenty first century! Ask him over here, then. I’m trying to persuade Hyungwon to actually go out in public with me tonight so you’ll have an empty room and no excuses.”

“Okay. I might do,” Hyunwoo replies.

(But he knows he won’t.)

 

\--

 

Hyunwoo isn't even sure how long ago practice officially ended when he leaves the pool. It's dark and wet out and he tugs at the collar of his team jacket, pulling it up higher around his neck, as a group filter past him, laughing and hanging off each other. He guesses this means it's late enough for people to be heading out to parties. Unless it's late enough for them to be heading back to their dorms again.

Hyunwoo really has no idea. Time disappears when he's swimming sometimes and since, as captain, he has a key to the building, he could be swimming all night and not realise. It’s happened before. It happened that night he first met Minhyuk. 

He checks his phone as he heads over the quad, finds a missed call from Changkyun and three texts from Hoseok, which read:

 

**Hoseok 21:56**

_r u still swimming? I'm at the movies with hyungwon, we are on a REAL DATE_

 

**Hoseok 22:13**

_go back 2 ours. there's a gift for u!_

 

**Hoseok: 22:20**

_get out of the pool!!! look, minhyuk keeps texting us asking 4 his spare key, pls go back 2 the dorm b4 hyungwon makes me come back to campus. the keys in hyungwon’s book bag._

 

\--

 

When he gets to his dorm, there's a figure skulking in the darkness of the doorway, except it isn't a figure, it's Minhyuk, in a loose t-shirt and sweatpants. And no shoes.

Minhyuk glances up as Hyunwoo approaches, his face lighting up when he realises who is there. Hyunwoo is kind of proud that he’s caused such a change.

“I got a text from Hoseok about you needing a key from Hyungwon?” Hyunwoo says, pulling an apologetic face. "Sorry, I think he sent it to me a while ago. I've been in the pool," he adds, even though that's completely fucking obvious since his hair is still wet from the shower and he's wearing his team jersey.

Minhyuk smiles. "That's okay. I've locked myself out of my building and Hyungwon mentioned you might be able to let me in here.”

Hyunwoo pulls his bag around his body and unzips it, sticks his hand in and feels around for his keys. Says, “You haven’t got shoes on again," and nods towards the ground.

Minhyuk looks down at his feet; he shuffles them and grimaces. "Yeah… I think my toes might go numb soon. I didn’t think there’d be a day I’d be glad that Hyungwon has a key to my room that he uses to come in and steal food that Kihyun's cooked."

“Is it stealing if he’s allowed in?” Hyunwoo asks; he thinks that he’d probably let Changkyun come in and steal all of the beers from his and Hoseok’s fridge if he asked nicely, though letting him have a key might just be asking for trouble.

"It's definitely stealing.” Minhyuk grins.

Hyunwoo laughs as he opens the door, motions for Minhyuk to go inside first and prides himself on the gentlemanly gesture as Minhyuk smiles. He makes it successfully awkward again by asking, "What were you doing asleep at nine thirty on a Friday?”

“Asleep?" Minhyuk wrinkles up his nose. This seems to be the wrong question, somehow. "Why would I have been asleep?"

“Well-- The sleepwalking… “ Hyunwoo rubs at his neck. Maybe Minhyuk doesn’t want to talk about it, maybe you’re not meant to mention someone’s secret habits that they appear to be incredibly embarrassed about when you’re trying to be charming. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have mentioned it, just -- I worry.”

“ _Oh_ ." Minhyuk blushes. "Yeah, I was sleeping. Sleep- _walking._ Don't worry about me, honestly, it's so embarrassing.”

"It's not embarrassing at all," Hyunwoo replies as they reach his room, because, honestly, it's kind of endearing, even if he sometimes panics that he hasn't locked up the pool building properly and that Minhyuk is going to end up sleepwalking into the deep end of the pool one night because of him.

“Sorry if you had to come back from the pool early because of me,” Minhyuk says as he hovers in the door-way. Hyunwoo passes him Hyungwon's discarded book-bag so he can take out the key. “Thanks for letting me in. Are you going back? Maybe I'll see you this week at-”

“Stay.” Hyunwoo manages to get out before Minhyuk finishes. Hoseok would be proud. That or dying of second hand embarrassment. “If you want. You could stay and, uh -- hang out for a while.”

Minhyuk actually grins, which Hyunwoo decides is a good sign. Maybe that didn't come out as desperate as it sounded. 

“I-- Well -- I’d like to but...” Minhyuk looks down at his feet, still bare, still pink from the cold. “I might go back to my room and, you know, change my wet clothes and put on some shoes.”

Hyunwoo nods. “Of course, yeah.”

“But I promise I’ll come back!” Minhyuk continues, like he can feel Hyunwoo’s uncertainty. “Fifteen minutes, ‘kay?”

“Okay. It’s a date." Hyunwoo replies. "I mean-- not a _date_ , just-- yeah.”

_Not smooth, Hyunwoo,_ he thinks as he watches Minhyuk leave. Hoseok would _not_ be proud after all. 

 


	7. losing touch with reality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are more mentions of drowning in this chapter; please be careful :)

When Minhyuk gets back to his room, his door is ajar and his laptop is still rolling through his itunes playlist. Luckily, his floor is pretty much deserted since it’s Friday night; everybody is either out forgetting about the week prior or travelling home for the weekend.

Travelling home like Kihyun - Kihyun who invited Minhyuk to go with him, to hang at his place for the weekend, eat some home-cooked food and subtly help him talk up his grades to his parents. And Minhyuk had almost said yes, but then he remembered that as much as Kihyun has allowed him to skirt around his zoning out and wandering around in the night recently, it wouldn’t be fair to subject his entire family to it, especially when it’s become considerably more frequent an occurrence over the last few weeks.

The last thing that Minhyuk remembers from earlier in the evening is being sat, cross-legged, on his bed, laptop on his knee as he agonised over the most boring piece of coursework ever dished out as a way to ignore his rumbling stomach. And then, suddenly he was in the middle of the quad in the rain, shoeless and coatless and keyless, the pool building just out of sight around the corner. Of course.

And _thank fuck_ he’d come to his senses then, because Minhyuk had found out after texting Hyungwon, desperately looking for a way to get back into his dorm without his keys or I.D, that Hyunwoo had been in there,  _alone_.

A part of Minhyuk, one he is trying so, _so_ hard to ignore, mourns this as a wasted opportunity.

 

\--

 

Minhyuk closes his laptop lid and stashes it away under his bed. He wonders if the fact that his heart is doing double-steps at the way that Hyunwoo had stumbled over asking him to hang out is related to the fleeting urges to sing sweetly into his ear and then watch him drown.

He’s trying to ignore those as well.

This, Minhyuk remembers, is why he is perpetually single. A penchant for suffering and seduction, not necessarily in that order, isn’t exactly a trait most people look for in a partner, after all, and Minhyuk knows that the more time he spends with Hyunwoo the more he’ll want this to be a date after all. And dates don’t end well for Lee Minhyuk.

 

\--

 

“This would be my first date in so long,” Minhyuk settles with his back against Hoseok’s bed, shoes firmly on his feet this time and accepts a can from Hyunwoo, whose eyebrows crease in confusion. Minhyuk doesn't know why he brings the subject up, but in looking for something to say it ends up being the first thing that comes out of his mouth, so he has to roll with it. “I mean, I know you said it’s not a date, but if it _was_ ,” Minhyuk shrugs. “I haven’t been on one since high school.”

“Really?” Hyunwoo asks, making it sound like the shock of the century, which makes Minhyuk wonder how he’d react if he knew that he was also half not-quite-mythological creature. “How is that possible?”

Minhyuk laughs. “I’m just not very good in that area, I suppose. My last date kind of put me off them as a whole.” He purses his lips, chooses his words wisely. “It was-- _bad_.”

Hyunwoo sits down opposite and asks, “A drinking warm beer in a dorm-room kind of bad date?”

“Worse. And I thought you said this wasn’t a date,” Minhyuk points out, smiling.

“I did." Hyunwoo says, but he's smiling. "So, what happened that was so bad?”

“Oh. You want the story?”

“If you want to tell it."

And Minhyuk could make up a lie, but he’s never been good at lying. Vagueities and twists of the truth are easier, Minhyuk already learnt this the hard way the night at the party that he came up with the lie that he had a classmate on the swim-team in the first place. So, he tells the truth. Kind of.

“I used to visit my aunt every summer in high school. She lived in this tiny coastal village and there was this guy that kept getting his friends to ask me out-” Minhyuk pauses as he takes in Hyunwoo’s grin. “Hey, don’t laugh at me, we were fifteen!”

“I’m not laughing,” Hyunwoo replies. He is, but Minhyuk doesn’t mind. It’s cute.

 _"Anyway,_ his family owned a fishing boat and for some reason I agreed to go out on it with him one night, totally without his father’s permission. I don’t know why -  it was so stupid; there was a storm and he was used to being out on the boat, and he was a strong swimmer and everything, but I - well, things got out of hand and someone could have died and...” Minhyuk realises he can practically taste the salt of the damp air on his tongue as he recalls that night and it scares him. He trails off from the story and looks up. Says, “It was worse than warm beer for sure.”

And it was, even if he can remember the overwhelming happiness he had felt as he watched the boy’s head disappear under the waves. The joy it brought him, as if this had been what he was made for all along. As if this was what was right.

But he also remembers the surge of panic as he realised what he had done and the shame that followed. And what made it worse was the boy’s unrelenting _loyalty_ and the way he looked so fondly at Minhyuk even as his father was shouting at him angrily in that half terrifying, half desperate way that worried parents do, at the hospital later. The way he remembered it as nothing but bad weather. He didn’t even remember the song Minhyuk had sang, or any singing at all, he just remembered waves and rain and bad luck. 

A siren’s song fucks you up; at least that’s what his aunt had told him, afterwards, until she was scolded by his mom for using such harsh language. His aunt had said, “Harsh truths require harsh words,” and they’d spoken in quiet voices and had ignored him as if he wasn’t there as he had loaded his suitcase into his mom’s car. His mom had sniffed at this but had quietly agreed. Had reminded his aunt that she was raising him _differently_ and said that maybe this place wasn’t good for him.

Minhyuk hadn’t been back to his aunt’s since.

He chews at his lip, adds, “Anyway, that’s the closest I’ve had to a real date in forever.”

Hyunwoo’s eyebrows are creased together again, but not in confusion this time. “No wonder you weren’t interested in trying out for the swim team, if you almost drowned when you were younger,” he says, understanding in his eyes as he reaches out and places a solid hand on Minhyuk’s knee with a lopsided smile, even if he doesn't really understand at all.

“Yeah.” Minhyuk returns the smile as best he can. He clears his throat, feels careless for bringing the subject up at all. “So, what about you? Any bad dates lately?”

Hyunwoo smiles. “I suppose I’ve been on a few dates since joining the team. Most courtesy of set ups by Hoseok,” he says. “And they’ve all gone… Okay? I’m just never sure if I’m doing the right thing or saying the right thing.”

Minhyuk considers this. “You’ve known the right things to say to me.”

“Even when I tried to invite you on a non-date?” Hyunwoo asks. He looks hopeful.

“Yep. I really like you, if you hadn't noticed.” Minhyuk sips his beer.

“Then, it should be official,” Hyunwoo replies. “Officially a date, I mean.” He smiles all the way to his eyes and Minhyuk smiles back, forgets about bad dates, and bad weather, and bad urges, if only for a moment.

Their date, in all it’s now official glory, is cut short as Hoseok and Hyungwon storm the room, fresh from their first official, actual, _outside_  date (as Hoseok describes it happily to them from the door) and, even though Hyungwon says nothing as they walk back towards their building, Minhyuk can tell from the sleepy grin he’s wearing that he had also enjoyed the real date experience himself.

 

\--

 

Later, Minhyuk brushes his teeth, stares into the mirror above the sink and thinks about rocky coastlines, pouring rain and unrelenting devotion and then presses those thoughts back down as far as they'll go and reminds himself that warm beer in warm dorm rooms and the whole normal, _human_ , college experience is what he really wants.

And it is, it _really_ is. It’s just-- maybe he needs an intervention. Or just someone to step in if he makes any move to try to lure the guy he really likes to his possible death this time. Maybe the saying that a problem shared is a problem halved is true (even if the problem is that his base desire is to enchant with a complete disregard for human life), or at least it’s worth a shot, so Minhyuk decides that when Kihyun returns to campus he’s going to tell him everything. Or try to, anyway.

Surely it can only go so wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there is anything else you would like me to tag please let me know & I'll get it up asap.


End file.
